When Trying Harder Isn’t the Answer: Why Fertility Healing Requires Spaciousness, Not Strain

If you've ever felt like you're doing everything right—tracking ovulation, cutting sugar, saying no to wine, forcing yourself to relax—but still not getting pregnant, you’re not alone.

I see this every day with my clients inside Thrive to Motherhood: Women who are burning out trying to “stay consistent” with their fertility routines… even when life is demanding more from them.

But here's what I've learned on both sides of the fertility journey—mine and theirs:

Efforting your way to pregnancy is not the way. You don’t need more supplements, tighter schedules, or one more test. You need safety in your nervous system. Spaciousness in your body. And a rooted belief that your body is not broken—it’s asking for support in a deeper, more sustainable way.

Real Talk: Last week, a client came to her session feeling completely stuck.

She had taken a break from fertility tracking after a personal loss, and now felt overwhelmed by the pressure to “get back into it.”

Her brain was saying: “You’ve lost time. You better get back on track fast. The clock is ticking.”

But her body? It Was screaming: “No. I’m not ready yet.”

We tuned into what was really happening beneath the surface. Beneath the push to do more was this belief:

“If I don’t keep trying, NOW, I will never become a mother.”

But that push was actually keeping her stuck.

What we did instead was help her drop back into trust. Into her body. Into a space where her nervous system could finally exhale—without efforting.

And you know what happened?

She didn’t do anything “special” that week.

But… she got her first regular cycle in months.

Because her body finally felt safe enough to show up for her.

Reproduction didn’t take a backseat for the first time in quite a while.

This is what happens when you do what I call “The Egg Awakening Work.”

When you stop chasing and start healing. When you rewire the inner story that says, “you’re running out of time." When you create space for life—not just in your calendar, but in your cells.

This is the work we do inside Thrive to Motherhood.

If you're ready to stop forcing and start receiving…If you want to heal from the root and call in life from a place of safety and connection…

When you're ready, message me “THRIVE” to explore what’s possible when you move from effort to ease. Because conception isn’t about control—it’s about connection.

With so much love, Heather

Certified Fertility Coach & Fellow TTC Warrior